You're My Favorite Flake Clear Card Fun!

Yesterday I shared a Wine Glass Votive Holder and today

using the same stamps I have these clear cards.

You're My Favorite Flake is the best quote ever! LOL

 Avocado Arts always makes me happy and stamping with white 

StazOn ink also makes me happy, Clear Scraps is such a fun product. 

 I wish the shimmer on this card would show, it's really pretty. 

The snowman shape is a Clear Scraps MINI album page .

Love love snowy crafting!

Not Your Usual Layout Idea!

Hey there friends, I have a layout with my sweet boy Gage.

For this unusual layout I used a Clear Scraps

 XL Shape base which I stenciled the corners with 

Modeling Paste, then spray painted the entire thing GOLD with Krylon.

Not your usual layout style I know, but I love it. 

It's my sweet Gage and his the picture shows the struggle in his eyes. 

Gosh I love this kid. This one was published in SNA in July.

I Will ALWAYS Fight Your Fight

Yes it's another Autism project I created for the month of 

April issue of Scrap N' Art. This one went straight into my son's room. 

This was to remind him that I am always going to go to battle

for him and nothing will ever stop that. 

 So much mixed media on here. 

I am so grateful he loves it. I hope he remembers this always. 

Together They Equal LOVE

Another layout? Yes I am on a roll, trying to get back to my roots in 

scrapbooking and preserve these precious faces! :) 

This layout is from the Creating Made Easy April Kit

I really struggled photographing this one too! 

You know I think I have forgotten how to snap a layout photo! :(

Anyways you get the idea, now go grab YOUR KIT and

revel in the fact that I have bad photo days just like everyone else!  hahaha

love you my friends....

https://www.clearscraps.com/ProductDetails.asp?ProductCode=April2015main

So Basically Mom...You Love Me..

Good morning Happy monday friends!

I have a few things to share today from TV & Tutorials to Tattoos.

So remember those flowers I created for that box that was on HSN?

Well this weekend there was a tutorial featured on Samantha Walker's blog

that I created for making them.  

And just in case you missed it- here is the video of my box on HSN!

http://www.hsn.com/products/teresa-collins-xyron-adhesive-kit/7350615

The funny part? I slipped cards in the box in case they needed them

but no one knew LOL so it was cute when she opened the box- 

Next time I will send a warning label! hahaha- 

 Oh and here is the link for the tutorial! :)

http://samanthaleewalker.blogspot.com/2014/01/making-vintage-layered-flowers-using-4.html

So excited to be back with SW and the gang! :) 

 And a VERY special even this weekend, for a few months now I 

have wanted an Autism tattoo- and a month ago I sent an idea to my 

artist Renee Johns in Nashville at Avenging Art Tattoo Shop. 

This tattoo is what she and I came up with and this last Friday night

I sat for 4 hours and had it done!

It says simply "I will fight your fight" and it's an incredibly touching tribute to

my amazing boy with Autism and his struggles. 

He asked me what "I will fight your fight means" I told him

to think of it like a boxing match, when he has trouble with school,

or bullies, or anything, I will always be there to help him and

fight for him. He said "So basically mom you love me"...well ya kid- 

I guess that about sums it up doesn't it?

He loved the idea and loves the tattoo- he saw it when 

I got home and said "SO COOL MOM".

I know my whole life seems to revolve around Autism right now

and I am probably boring some of you. 

But when your child is sick- you go to the mat and you stay there

until it's right...so I am very proud to share my tattoo with everyone today! :) 

Muah! Thanks for all your love and support! 

Be back tomorrow with another cool project!

Autism: To Tell Or Not To Tell.....I TOLD...How It Helped..

Good morning friends, 

So clearly I jam more than crafts into my blog and as my life

evolves I definitely am not shy about speaking about it. 

Today I get to talk about my beautiful Autistic son and my decision 

to tell him that he has Autism.

Now I know this might be highly controversial but in the end I believe that

it is a personal choice and my choice might not work for you or your

child, or it might, who knows? I am no expert, I am chopping down

the jungle one branch at a time just like you! 

So this is how I came to my decision:

I watched this video....

and I cried...then I watched it again. 

I LOVE how frank and completely intelligent the mom is and how her son

responds in an incredible way. I highly recommend you watch and share. 

Anyways back to our story...after watching it made me realize

that I needed to decide whether I was going to tell Gage he had Autism

or not. Which worried me because I did not want him to use it as a crutch

in life saying "well I can't because I have Autism" or what not. 

I often hear kids who know they have ADD or other problems say 

"well I can't help it I have..." which is fine but it's not always a good excuse

for poor behaviour. I definitely did NOT want Gage to say 

"I melt down because I have Autism" because even with Autism I still

believe and expect him to try his best and learn to control himself to the 

best of his ability. 

So I went back and forth for 3 days on this subject in my head. 

Ways I would tell him, ways I would hide it. Is he old enough?

Will he be upset?

Will it change anything? 

I kept researching.....

After 3 days of back and forth I decided that I would tell him. 

Because I remember him coming to me after a baseball game last year,

he was crying and he told me very specifically this:

"Momma, I want you to take me off the ball team. I am DRAGGING them down

because I am no good. I am a bad player, I am nothing like Jaxon or

the other boys. I can't do what they do. BUT I want them to win! 

so please take me off the team so I don't drag them down. I suck,

I totally suck"

of course at the time we did not have an Autism diagnosis that would explain 

his poor fine motor skills, we did not know how much anxiety he had

due to Autism, we had no idea the problems were due to a legitimate

problem, we just knew he struggled and bless his heart I loved that child

all the same, I would do anything to keep him from feeling that way. 

That thought kept coming back to me, call it intuition, call it God, 

call it a Higher Power, I don't care what you call it, it kept creeping

back into my head. 

So the next day I sat him down and we ate dinner and I said 

"Baby, do you know what Autism is??"

Him: "No what is it?"

Me: "It's a disorder that makes people think and feel differently"

Him: "Like a dog thinks?"

Me: "No like a human, but a VERY smart human, 

who is so smart in so many ways but in some areas it is 

difficult to communicate and be around other people.

It makes it hard for people to be friends and it makes it hard to focus

on one thing at a time, so many thoughts all at once all the time.

You have Autism"

Him: "Me? so I am super smart??"

Me: "Of course you are! But it also might make it hard for you

to do certain things, things that require your hands. Like buttons..."

Him: "Hey I can't button things"

Me: "I know- buttons, tying shoes, catching balls, things like that"

Him: "So I am not stupid because I can't tie my shoes?"

Me: "No you are so very smart!"

Him: "But I am almost 10 and I can't tie my shoes, that makes me stupid."

Me: "No it is the Autism, it's just part of it."

Him: "I am not stupid! I can't tie my shoes because of Autism, 

not because I am stupid! But I can learn because Autism isn't bad it's just different"

The relief in his mind made it all worth it. 

I feel he finally realized that he wasn't stupid or dumb, he was just 

Gage and it was OK! It was almost as if relief washed over him. 

My focus now is letting him understand that Autism is not bad

or ruining his life- but simply changing it. So for now, for us

it works. For him it was a relief and for me it was a break through.

I never realized the IMMENSE amount of guilt he felt

over the smallest things in life. 

Tying shoes,

buttons, baseball, sports, and so much more. 

I guess now it's my job to continue to let him know how amazing he

is to feed his passions and push him forward without the burden or 

feeling stupid or lacking. 

Thanks to Story Corps for the video...one step closer and one step forward!

Have a great Tuesday my friends. 

See Beauty And Autism Through My Eyes

Yes you have a wonderful child full of talent and grace, they will go far and be amazing. 

Probably class president, the most popular kid in school, breezing through with ease.
I see you looking at me like I am weird and I see you look at my child like he is a brat or spoiled. 

I hear those comments you make, even if you make them sound nice. That's fine. 

I am happy that you have such an amazing life and great kids, truly I am. 

Maybe you could look at me and my child with less judgmental eyes if just for today.

 You don't know what we deal with every day. 

You don't see my child being made fun of every day, 

struggle with being lonely and struggle with their lack of communication skills.
You see a child who screams or "melts down" but you don't see
the invisible pain and lack of ability to convey emotions and thoughts. 
You don't think what it must be like to not be able to speak or get the
words to the tongue whenever you want. That is a blessing many take for granted. 
And no, it's not because I am a bad parent and if I was more 

like you than it would be fixed. No I am not spoiling my child and allowing him to act out. 

It is because my amazing and beautiful child has Autism. 

My child who is just as amazing as your child, only different. 

My child who will change the world one day- 
my child will one day find their voice and find their way. 

It might not be the same way your child does everything, 

it might not be quite as easy or quite as fancy, 

we might not skate through with all the awards, 

but it will be BEAUTIFUL and a journey worthwhile. 

Sometimes the most beautiful butterfly is hidden in a 

cocoon that no one notices until it spreads it's wings. 
Sitting there silent in a darkened world waiting to fly. 

Love more, judge less, respect our journey-

 remember your looks and comments do hurt, even the strongest of us. 

As I sit committed to holding the hand of my incredible child and

I see the pain they carry and bear every single day.

I will cheer on your child and respect your amazing parenting skills,

 I will not feel "less than" or ashamed of my child or my life. 
I will admire your children and your blessed situation, as we are ALL blessed. 

I will stand proud and know in my heart that it takes ALL KINDS

to make the world go around. Not just the amazing so called "normal" people,

but the incredible emerging people who are different and think in other ways.

Today is my birthday and I thought that I would share my personal 
feelings on how I am perceived and judged. Not with hate or anger
but with more of a sad and heavy heart today. 

Have a beautiful day my friends. 

Autism- Searching For Answers....Rubbing And Self Harm

Good morning friends, 

We have struggled this week and every time I am struggling

I tell myself..."Cristal, when you were a little girl NO ONE cared

about you, nor did they care what happened to you. You are NOT

going to be those people. You DO care and you WILL go on no matter how hard".

So I do...I go on...

This week has been busy and that is why I have not posted daily as usual. 

After my first "Autism" post we have attended a conference, 

we have gone to the school board, found a liaison, studied, switched schools

and so much more!!
I could not have done it without my friends for sure!!
They have cared, stood by me and held me up while I was down. 

Now I am the first person to admit I do not want my life to be

revolved around Autism now that we have a diagnosis, 

but I am also the FIRST person to tell you that we have always

had the boys involved in causes because it is healthy to be aware. 

From children who have been raped and abused in Oregon to

pillowcases for Conkerr Cancer here in TN- to Special Needs baseball.

And clearly this is just another avenue in our life to raise 3 boys

who love and understand this world is FULL of beautiful souls. 

So yes, you might get tired of my "Autism" posts. And no I won't

stop posting them, because we embrace this as much as anything else that comes

into my life. 

When I first begin speaking about about being raped and abused

I found my voice and it has helped others. 

Being kept silent for all those year taught me to shout it out everywhere

I go. And this diagnosis will be the same.

After finding no help with the school we decided to move my son.

As difficult as change is for my son- it was more difficult staying where

he felt the need to rub himself until he bled. 

I did not understand fully why- he kept telling me just because

and we searched for an answer, but in the end it was simply

such overwhelming anxiety from the class he was in.

I am HAPPY to report that since changing school the rubbing, burning, and

self harm has stopped completely. As much as I was afraid of the change

for him- the comfort took over in his mind. 

So it was a fantastic step for us as a family! 

Those who are close to us know how much of a struggle that was.

I guess keeping my Autistic son feeling safe in his mind was the skeleton 

key that took us a couple months to find. 

I think that is the most difficult part of Autism-

finding the key to what is a problem. Without the language 

skills to communicate it's like a giant guessing game. 

That's the hardest part for me, because I am one of those moms- 

find the problem FIX IT...no messing around just fix it. 

Now I get to play "Find the problem"....which takes far longer than

the fix it most days. 

As I am NEW to this world and I freely admit to knowing NOTHING

I will say I an not new to life and it's struggles, so I say to any Autism mom

DON'T GIVE UP!

Fight fight fight and fight more....camp outside offices like I did. 

Cry, cry and cry more, do what you have to do because NO ONE ELSE WILL!

It was not easy getting to change schools, I fought, I literally camped outside offices

and went to every single liaison I could find. 

Now I am on the hunt to EDUCATE myself...yes educate while being

a mom, teacher, wife and taxi driver. Nothing will push me harder than

knowing that if I give up my son loses and frankly- that's just not going to happen. 

I go back to myself and say.....

"NO ONE fought for me. No one cared." 

I will not let that happen to my son, he will KNOW that someone cared. 

When he told me this week he knows I have his back I knew

everything was going to be alright.